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If we can't have the world, no-one can!


  
 
 
 
 
  

NEGLIGENT DRIVERS'
INSURANCE SERVICES

A division of the NI group of companies, directly affiliated with the Negligent Employers' Insurance Society

NDIS: two million drunks can't be wrong!

 BAD DRIVING RECORD?

KEEP CRASHING YOUR CAR?

 GOT A DEATH TRAP OF A VEHICLE?

PRONE TO HIT & RUN ACCIDENTS?

KILLED MORE THAN THREE PEOPLE ON THE ROAD?

 BANNED FOR LIFE?

 NEVER FEAR, THE NDIS IS HERE!

 If you can answer three or more of the above questions, then you are guaranteed to be accepted, yes, we will insure ANYONE

 We don't care if your driving record is, ahem, "less than perfect", if you are willing to pay our fees*, then we are willing to issue you a cover note. We don't give a toss if you are only sixteen and driving a Ferrari Testarossa, or if you are a paraplegic intent on taking your Honda Goldwing to the limits of its performance, we will insure you.

OK, so our rates might be a little high, but how much is peace of mind worth to you? You owe it to yourself to take out one of our policies at the earliest opportunity. At least we don't bullshit you with cheap gimmicks about how inexpensive we are. Our reputation is one for giving it to you straight.

Forget all that "I've had the Privilege" shite, or that incredibly annoying "Da da da la, da da da da da Daaa" jingle from the Direct Line adverts, WE are the people with whom your money will be safe.

The proof of all this? Last year, the NDIS declared the highest gross profits EVER for any company in the history of mankind **.

 So what are you waiting for? Our highly efficient sales team are waiting for you to call, just pick up that 'phone & end your insurance troubles...forever.

Directors: M L White (NDIS founder), A J Summersgill (Associate Director, NDIS), T O McCormack (Associate Director & CEO, NEIS)

* Your home and family are subject to search &/or seizure if you do not keep up your Insurance payments & you can expect a visit from large men with lump hammers if you default in any way

** This is mostly due to our policy of not paying out any money to anyone, EVER, even if they are owed what they want. Please note that any claim you make will NOT be paid under any circumstances. We pride ourselves on having the most efficient claims department of any Insurance company around.

In fact, if your claim is not repudiated within ONE working day, you will receive a DOUBLY vitriolic letter as recompense.